Negative reactions can have positive results

I have taught myself to sit back and find the good in a bullying situation.  It could take years from when the bullying takes place, but I will get something out of it. Inside, I have the ability to turn word bruises into courage.  Kids weren’t exactly picking on me because I was different, they were picking on me because they didn’t understand who I truly was.

In my younger years, when I would get carried off the school bus by my helper- before I had a bus with a lift and a powerchair, kids would point and laugh at me not being able to walk. I would shrink down as small as I could and hide my face in my jacket. When I used to be judged or bullied, feelings of sadness or depression would take place. At the time, I had no idea that these feelings that I was experiencing were preparing for my life battles ahead. The words that were being spoken, may be having a negative result but were going to have a positive result in the end.

Today, there have been times when I’m having a conversation all of a sudden, I am completely blindsided when I hear a phrase like “You look like you have been eating well” insinuating that I have gained weight. Then the person leans over and rub my stomach and laugh, and say “do you have a baby in there?”  Throughout my 40 years, these daggers thrown at me from close people in my life, to people of little relevance to me. What does this person expect me to say back? “Yes, I’ve gained weight, “thank you?”

With a slight smile the words bounce off me. It could be because of these insults that, I do more sit-up’s or lift weights for a longer amounts of time. With my powerchair and just overall demeanor being the way it was, it has opened me up to potential criticism.  Looking back on life, I’m very happy that these situations took place because it, better shaped me into the person I am today.  Not giving up and wanting to be the best version of myself, no matter what the circumstance has truly taught me the art of perseverance.

It’s up to me and only me, to treat it as a learning opportunity for the bully. What tends to work well, was when I smile at them.  This showed them that I care and appreciate them for making me better. I continue to reach up someone is always here for me. An aspect of life that I can gain from being bullied is the fact that it increases my “minds strength”.  

These words will not stop a person from being bullied, but it’s my hope that it will help people cope and become healthier and happier. With every insult that’s thrown my way, I treat them like medicine.  They can taste awful, but help my soul strength grow in the end. 

Alex Lytwyn